Thursday, July 16, 2015

Grandview Geysers

The Grandview area before the Dreck Geyser spouted

[Residents of the Grandview area reported that during the recent
torrential rains, sewers spouted like geysers.]

As sewage erupted from the sewers,
Like sepia geysers in the air,
Chief among the wrongdoers
Was "D'reck,"* our city manager.

One of the high risers,
Filled to the odiferous brim,
One of the Grandview Geysers, 
Should be named after him.

Let's call one the Shyster Geyser,
After the notorious Mike Mearan.
Let's call another the Kevin W. Geyser,
After the officious First Ward con man.

But let's name the biggest of all,
The geyser with the brownest luster,
The geyser with the most offal,
After our septic shitty manager.

Yes, let's call it the D'reck Geyser
Because it's so full of shit.
Let's call it the D'reck Geyser
Just for the hell of it.
               Robert Forrey, 2015

*Dreck (pronounced der-reck) is a Yiddish word
that is synonymous with the English word shit.

No, those are not Grandview residents watching the Dreck Geyser.
Those are tourists at Yellowstone National Park viewing the
most famous of all geysers, Old Faithful.